Embrace Present: 3 Steps to Overcome Comparison with your Past
For past one year, I have not been up to my optimum fitness level. I believe, moving to a new country, adjusting to new weather and food had a role in it. Last summer, I re-started my fitness journey. At first it felt good about the effort. But within 30 days, I felt a bit of frustration creeping in my attitude. I was pushing myself too hard. I was constantly reminding myself of 2019, 2020 — years when I was at my highest fitness level. I was constantly thinking about those days and trying to achieve the same result now — within few days. I noticed few symptoms of mental pressure that I was building on myself unnecessarily.
- The feeling of low self-esteem was quite evident. I was low on confidence.
- Unconsciously, I was indulged in negative self-talk and criticism. No matter, how much efforts I put in today, I was never satisfied with my current progress. In the back of my mind, I was thinking that I am not living up to my full capacity, my fitness level.
- Failure to achieve results and regain my fitness in such a shot span led to loss of motivation and a feeling of hopelessness. This went to an extent that I gave up my fitness journey all together.
Hence, I reached a point where I recognised that my constant comparison with my past is not only impacting my relationship with my own-self, with my family but also impacting my mental health. It was time that I take steps to address and overcome this syndrome.
Stopping the Self-Comparison with my Past
It’s so easy to fall into depression by constantly thinking about the past. It’s rather difficult to break the chain of thoughts once kicked of. I would go on thinking how good I was — my stamina, my endurance, my flexibility etc. back in 2019, 2020. What went wrong? what am I doing wrong now? Why I am not achieving the same results? Understanding my agitation and frustration, my partner and my friends gave some advice.
Focus on present moment:
I am often living in past or in my future. Living in present moment can be challenging. I noticed that I when I am working and fully immersed in my work, my focus is tact. But as soon as I am relaxed, my thoughts drift. Hence, I challenge myself to live in the present and focus on what I can do right now. As soon I become aware that I am thinking too much about past, I stop myself that very moment. I tell myself to be in present.
Set realistic Expectations from self:
Accepting your present identity can be challenging especially if you have a proven past record. Hence, it is crucial to set the achievable and realistic goals for self. I try to focus on the steps that will help me to reach my current goals. Whenever I compare myself with past, I challenge the thought and replace it with a positive one.
Surround yourself with positive people
Having the support system around encourages me to give my best in present rather than being lost in my past. This is one of the best gifts. Such people celebrate my success, the little progress that I make everyday and make me feel more grateful for what I have in present, rather than what you don’t have. My partner constantly reminds me how good I am now, what I can achieve more by focusing on my present form. This is a blessing indeed.
I have come a long way since then. I am improving my ways of handling my thoughts. I am not looking back every now and then.
It’s good to compete with your own-self and measure how far you have come rather than comparing yourself to others. But putting pressure on your present self based on your past can be detrimental to your mental health. It’s a thin line between the two. Become aware of where you stand today and take steps to move forward and not in past.
